You don't know pain
by ShadowBYeBYe
Summary: Requested Fic. Suki's imprisonment. Final chapter is up.
1. Chapter 1

**Naturae Debitum – this one is for you. You had requested it forever again and to tell you the truth I am dragging ass on my requests. For the reader that requested the toph/katara torture fic, I PROMISe, it is coming. As is the Aang, and Sokka/Suki ones...eventually...some time...**

Fucking darkness. It seemed all that ever surrounded me. The screams of pain from the sting of flaming whips would keep me awake at night. Do not disobey the guards. That is what the veteran prisoners would tell the newcomers. But, because of my eyes, and hair, I wasn't told this. I was an outsider. If there was a tiny possibility that you didn't notice, all of the other prisoners were either Earth Kingdom, Fire Nation or Water tribe. True, I am Earth Kingdom as well, but I don't look the part. My point being, that all the other prisoner had darker hair. Meaning brown or black. You didn't see a red head anywhere. It often has made me question my own origins, but during my stint in those horrid prisons, I didn't have time to question anything.

When I was taken to the first prison, I was stripped of all of my belongings. It was a woman's prison, but that doesn't mean it was any less harsh. All of the women's heads were shaved but that didn't cut back on my being singled out. But the guards were the worst. Liasa was the head guard at the first prison. She hated me with a passion. Her face haunts my nightmares. My second night there I was brought out of sleep by her boot crashing into my face. The blood filled my mouth before I could even shake off the dizziness. She pulled me to my feet and struck me again. I had obviously done something to piss her off. My head swam and the nausea wrecked my stomach. I felt her strong blow come to my chest when I didn't answer her. I can remember vividly falling to the ground hacking blood and trying to force myself to breathe. The weight of her boot slamming into my chest still reverberates inside me when I dream. I can recall knowing the very second when my ribs cracked. I knew I was going to die under her boot. My body was on fire and my spirit was at it's weakest point. I was finished. I don't know why, and even now I wonder, but she stopped. She stopped stomping on me just short of crushing my skull. I had tried to push myself up, but my arms didn't want to hold my weight. The blood splattered warm across my hands when my face slammed into the stone floor. The world turned black. I tried to fight it, to fall asleep was to admit defeat. But no matter how hard I would fight and try, it was no use.

The world swirled into the darkness as my body became weightless. I seemed to float in the sensationless void for years. It was only when my body began to feel heavy again, that the pain settled in. The swelling across the bridge of my nose brought me awake as I fought to take a breath. I could feel the bruises forming over my face, and the obviously broken cartilage in my nasal cavity. The blood had dried on my face. It wasn't until I finally was able to breath that the real pain shot through me. I could feel the pressure in the bottom of my feet as one of my shattered ribs pushed further into that precious organ. I knew that if I moved to much or to quickly that I could puncture my lung. I can remember that I marveled at how the bitch had managed to do so much damage, but not force the broke bone into my lung.

She didn't want to kill me. She could have if she would have wanted too. I was a toy. A fucking way to vent her anger that she knew wouldn't pass with any of the benders. I was a warrior, but in a weakened and starved state, I was vulnerable to say the least. Oh, did I not mention the small detail that in that prison we had to fight for our food. It wasn't stand in line and get served, it was beat the hell out of the bitch in front of you before they ran out. Guess who was always at the end of the line. If I wasn't trying to recover from the injuries Liasa gave me, I was trying to stay away from the big dogs. There was a pack of them. They were all big bitches, in all the meanings of the phrase. Mhij was the leader. I had heard of prison gangs, but I hadn't had the displeasure of meeting one. That is until Mhij decided that I needed more punishment than the guards could dish out.

Beat the freak. Those words echo in my head more than they should, I guess. Mhij was evil. That is all there was to it. Liasa's attacks came unprovoked, yeah, but the Harem, as they called themselves, would attack after attacks. They would force me into the corner and that would be it. I lost several teeth and gained many a broken bone due to their attacks.

There was one attack in particular that haunts me at nights. I keep saying that things bother me at night or that things give me nightmares. But think for a one moment, put your self in my fucking position. Imagine for a moment the force to two women twice your size striking you full force with broom handles. Now take that twisted little mental imagine and mold it into a sick twisted fantasy of a inmate. Think of how the hell it felt to have those same women using those same broom handles to have their way with you.

How the fuck would you keep from having nightmares? How the hell would you handle it?

As I was saying there one attack in particular that left lasting scars. Mhij had decided that I had been neutral for entirely too long. I belonged to no one, and I was on neither the Harem's or the Chuppa's side. It doesn't work that way in prison. You have to have a side, but I wanted neither. As far as the Chuppa's went they left me along, but Mhij and the Harem? I was lucky to get out of that prison alive. They caught me in my cell. As they backed me into the corner I naturally tried to fight. I was a warrior. I had gotten out of scrapes with Fire Nation soldiers, I could handle a few prison inmates. The difference between the soldiers and the inmates? Well the soldiers were more interested in taking prisoners, the inmates were out for blood.

My arm was broken in seven places by the time they were done. I couldn't talk through the swelling in my mouth and tongue . Four women held me while Mhij and her bitch Ryhu stomped me. Their boots feel heavy and hard. Sharp kicks and stomps lead into punches and bites. I probably have scars littering my back from where their teeth broke the skin. They wanted to break me. Force me to hand my self over to one of them. Become their property.

Shit, I would have rather died. And that was what I told them. I remember thinking just before I fell into unconsciousness that I was going to die. Plain simple and unavoidable. Then the darkness came as the shooting pain fired over me.

**Naturae Debitum- Okay Okay I know you said when Azula took her prisoner. Well I'm gonna get to that. This is basically going to be four mor chapters long. Next chapter will be Azula's interrogation, then the next chapters will be two other prisons ending with Boiling rock before Sokka shows up. Groovy?**


	2. Chapter 2

Same song second verse. I hope you like Suki's inner salior.

* * *

Now take those thoughts, and that nice little mental picture you have and imagine waking up with the queen of demons staring down at you with wickedly yellow eyes. Conniving bitch. I didn't learn until much later that all of the attacks and beatings, even those bu the Harem came under the order of High Bitch Azula. She wanted my ass broken, when she got to me. She wanted me torn to pieces and on the verge of sanity. The cunt wanted me to talk. To spill all the secrets that I knew about the avatar. Hand him over for my freedom. Stupid little princess. Didn't she know that I was on the highest priority list to be saved? Did she not realize that the love of my life was probably two steps behind her an don his way to free me?

She knew well enough. Knowing that Sokka meant so much to me she used that little bit of information against me. She twisted every question to mean that if I told her she would take me to him and drop me off. Lying witch. You can always tell someone is lying when they are on the other side and thinking that you should trust them. Why the fuck would I trust anyone? I had just survived the most excruciating experience of my life and here this little fucker was with an outstretched hand and a dagger behind her back.

Fat chance. But perhaps it wasn't the smartest move I had ever made in calling her all the names I could think of. My fucking luck that I hadn't gained enough sense back to realize that I was bolted to a chair. To my horror the anger didn't rise in the princess like I would have hoped. Instead that little smile covered her face as she looked down at my feet. A damned tub of water sat at the base of the chair, my feet securely tied inside of it. Fear washed over me in mad torrents as the lightening began to crackle around her hand. I was nor have I ever claimed to be a genius, but I knew just form living on the ocean, what would happen in that lightening was to come in contact with that water surrounding my feet. The cowardice in me screamed for me to tell her what she wanted t know. To beg and cry for her to stop and plead for forgiveness. No. I would not. But that first show sent the tickling stinging sensations over my body as the blood inside of me dance. After the initial shock, the pain set in. The burning of nerves and the violent scarring of my organs as they danced to the current flowing through my body. Tears had streamed down my face as the blood broke from my nose. My toes had curled beyond the point of pain and my fingernails had started to dig deep into my palms.

"_Shockingly persuasive, don't you think?" _Call me callous and bitter if you would like, but the fact that she lost her mind and is effectively wasting away at the hands of Mhij brings more comfort than it should. It serves her right. All the heinous acts that she committed in cold blood with a smile on her face, I would have preferred to see her drawn and quartered by the fastest fire rhinos they could find. Dark? Yes. Cruel? Yes. Do I give a fuck? No. I have grown callous and I have grown bitter. Inside I am boiling with hate, though I may not chose to show it outwardly. Personally my taste for revenge hasn't been satisfied. I would like to see all those who hurt me killed or tortured in the most painful and slowest manner possible.

I am not a bad person. I am a tortured soul who was rescued a little too late. Those frightening jolts still cause tremors in my arms from time to time. But that wasn't even the worst part of her 'persuasion'. Several tiny sharp bars were pushed just under my skin. Two holes, one going in the other going out. She had shoved them into my arms and watched as the blood trickled down my arm.

It hurt like fuck but that wasn't the worst part yet. She once again lit up the tub of water, but this time as the burning sensations shot through me, the metal scalded the skin around them.

I'm so sick of having those memories. Azula's stupid laughing ringing over me as she persisted in asking me questions. I wasn't going to tell her. I was not going to hand over ot only solution to the problem. Fuck Her. She could do her worst and believe me she did. But I wasn't not going to be the reason the world fell tot he fire nation.


	3. Chapter 3

Months of such fucking torture at the hands of that little lightening wench, made me realize that while all life is precious, nothing could be near as sweet as that final taste of life just before you pass on to the spirit world. I had let out a streaming sigh of relief when I learned that I was going to be moved from that hell hole. But again, my luck, I was taken and dropped in the middle of a fucking boiling lake. Have I ever mentioned the fact that I have fire benders? Well I do. One thing I could have and would have given anything to see would have been miles upon miles of rotting fire nation corpses, bloating and bleeding in the sun that gave them so much power. Torn limb from limb and strewn across the nations left to decompose and in the long run grown back the trees and forests that they destroyed. I'm a dark little bitch aren't I? But you can't tell me that wouldn't be a delightful and pleasing picture. To see those who destroyed this world, forced to regrow it over time. As I said I was ecstatic to hear of my transfer, until I actually got there. No more all female prisons for me. Nope. Now they set me in with the dankest and most foul bunch of prisoners known to the fire nation. The only good thing is that several of the other prisoners happened to be prisoners of war. Meaning, people like me. But that didn't keep the drama away. Cute little read headed girl around sixteen doesn't last long innocence wise around a place like this. I had to learn hard and fast just who I had to keep my ass away from, or it would become theres. There were other women prisoners, few and far between, but none the less. So it wasn't like I was alone, but who the hell would trust another female in a place like this? I found that out the hard way.

Santina. Why is it that I have the worst luck when it comes to females? Santina I thought was my friend. After a few weeks we had grown quiet close and I longed from her company when I was not with her. She became my life support. My one last string of hope that held me tied to sanity in between the beatings and the whole running from the big guys routine. She was also on the regular end of the beating list, and I heard her screams more than once when the guards or one of the not so friendly 'big guys' got ahold of her. Not only had I heard her screams, I held her afterwards as she cried against me. More than anything I wanted to be free. I wanted her to be free too. Until she sold me.

It wasn't for her own freedom or even to get her own ass out of a jam. It was for opium. Some how, and I could probably think of how but I don't want to, one of the prisoners that was freshly transferred had concealed the crap and started word around the prison of what he had. But he demanded payment, and fair payment at that. Santina couldn't afford the fee he was asking so she bargained, and bargained. Then she decided that I, being the 'untouched' female I was, considering that I had managed to keep my self from being torn into while at that prison, would be perfect payment. So much so that she actually got double the opium she had bargained for. Lucky her. So once again I became a bitch, but fight back as I might, this man wasn't one to fight with.

He was double my size in height and weight. He was a monster of a man, and as advanced as I was with my fighting skills nothing prevailed against him. I even resorted to more primal and woman like attacks. I bit and I clawed, if he would have had hair I would have damn sure yanked as much of it out as I could have put my hands on. The scary and most horrifying thing that I had to realize, was that this sick bastard enjoyed being hurt. Every time I bit him and the skin broke releasing that flood of metallic fire into my mouth he would get more anxious and ready. I hate to be vulgar but this man was one of nightmares. No man should be made like that man was. I do believe his father must have been an ostrich-horse. As he had his way with me I could feel every inch of myself tearing. The first time he left me covered in blood. A mixture of my own and his from the bite marks and scratches I had littered over him. The fucking broom handle didn't seem as bad after he was finished with me. But once he claimed me as his own, the regular beatings stopped and I no longer had to play run-from-the-big-guys anymore. I firmly believe that even the shadows and the spirits that haunted those halls feared him. I shall not call him by a name, I don't want to give him even that little of respect. I became his toy. I never gave up fighting though, and once before he was killed I was able to gouge one of his eyes out. My body had never been so sore after he got through with me that night. I had puked until I had nothing left but acid. I had tried to curl myself into the smallest ball possible but that didn't make the pain go away. I begged for death to take me. If I could have just pissed off one of the guards, If only I could have pressed those buttons so far until he just lost it. Death would have been the best release for me. As I laid there bleeding and crying, trembling in the corner of that cell cursing every guard that knew what was going on but only chuckled and turned away, I planned my revenge. Santina would suffer at my hands. Revenge wasn't my strong suit but I could plan a fucking going away party like the best around. After the night's onslaught I wasn't able to walk for a few days, so I received lashing after lashing for not being able to complete my chores. At ever snap of the whip I would send my curses up to the spirits, and toward them. Damning their mother and promising to kill any offspring they ever had. It didn't do any use. Even after the whip covered in flames and that fire licked into my back as it lashed deeper into already open and oozing wounds, I still didn't die. What a cruel fate that was. Who had I pissed off so in the spirit world that they would knowingly allow this punishment and not save me from my torment and despair?

But now I can smile and even let out a girlish giddy giggle when I look back on the way he died. It was oh so gruesome and just so satisfying. It frightened me at first that I drew so much pleasure from his agony and pain, but I got over it. It turns out one of the new prisoner's of war had become quite found of me, even though I hadn't said a word to him at all. Yhiv was a most remarkable man. He had a vast knowledge of poisons and had made himself immune to a number of the ones that could very easily kill. This isn't a man that you would have wanted working kitchen duty, but of course if they had no knowledge of the fact, no harm was done. Yhiv had easily and quickly laced his food. He had enjoyed it to the last drop, commenting on the sublime almond taste. I was sitting next to him as I was always forced to do so that he could make sure that no one touched me.

He and I had were on our way back to his cell, more appropriately he was dragging me back to his cell for another round of 'fun', when he collapsed to the floor. His knees buckled and he just fell. He grabbed his stomach like it was going to explode and his body began to twitch and jolt violently. I quickly disappeared into the growing crowd. That's when I met Yhiv for the first time and learned of the service had had done me.

I was indebted to him but that was something I would never have admitted to him. You don't want to owe someone in prison. They tend to take things back in full plus interest. He was a handsome man to be the sneaky, wily, conniving little weasel he was. We became friends but friendship is only a stones throw from disaster. I was relieved to be free of him, but after that I became a slave to Yhiv. Not in a manner that I had been to the others, but as my raising demanded. I knew that I owed him my sanity.....I shouldn't say that because before Santina sold me over I thought I had owed her my sanity. Turns out I had a lot more wits about me that I gave myself credit for But I did owe him. There was no telling the amount of pain that he saved me from.

He was sent to one of the freezers, even though he wasn't fire nation and couldn't bend. I never saw him after that. I pretty much accepted the fact that those heartless fuckers let him freeze to death. They say freezing to death is like slowly going to sleep and never waking up. I'm not sure if I believe that. Sounds like a horrible way to die if you ask me. I pride myself through it all on not giving up though. I was a fighter. I learned after getting myself out of countless scrapes in the yard that I was not meant to die there. If I had been I would have been dead already. Those bastards wouldn't keep me for very much longer.

And then who the fuck should show up? Guess. Yep you got it little miss cunt for a face herself. That little bitch. I have mentioned that I don't particularly care for that woman, haven't I? I have? Well, I'll say it again. I pray that little bitch meets a slow and bitter end and that even in the after life her soul is tormented by the hundreds of souls whose lives she ruined.

She had more questions for me. This time there was no bucket, there was no lightening. Only me and her in a locked cell. If she would have tried her electrical attack in the steel cell she would have made herself nice and crispy along with me. No she just wanted to talk. Tried to make me her friend. I didn't buy it nor did I bite into her trap. She wasn't happy but she didn't hurt me. I still to this day don't know what angle she was trying to pull or just what that corrupted little mind of hers had thought up, but it was the most confusing experience during my stint as a prisoner.

My last month there was fairly uneventful. That is until Sokka showed up. Who would have known, he and the prince of the fucking fire nation? Well you know what happened after that. But I still have the heat of hatred harbored deep within my chest. Revenge and death radiates constantly on the back of my mind. It takes some discipline and high concentration not to let my newly formed homicidal side make it's shining debut. But if there was one thing I learned in prison that can be put towards use in everyday life, always keep the most vital part of you hidden, if you don't you could end up with a knife through it. In short, wear your heart on your sleeve and it's bound to get torn off. There now you know my story. Sad wasn't it? Now if you don't mind I have some work to do. Force that same old smiling happy personality, y'know. Seriously, you've managed to fuck up enough of my time. So go away and leave me the fuck alone before I kill you, because now you know I'm just itching to release all those repressed emotions.

**I love a bitchy two sided Suki. Or maybe it's the idea I like. She seemed just a little too happy in prison. She should have been completely overwhelmed by being in prison, cuz you know she had to go through some hell. My diagnosis? Severe repression and deep mental anguish causing closet depression and homicidal, if not also suicidal, tendancies? Non? Yay! This one is finished!**


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